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sometimes..u just duno how.. y ..wen ..it just hurts bad.. so bad .. all u do it down n cry ..without knowing y .. when u really ask urself but y da hell am i really crying .. u got no answer..u cant explain.. it just hurts bad.. so bad u feell everything collapsing ..u feel shattered.. so damn lonely..and ironically for just no reason..

c just un coup blues..des coups blues sa arrive..mais un peu tro souvent c temps si..
tro souvent mem..
so damn home sick..just wana get back home.. u know the feeling of.. ur excited abt a thing.. ull go around have fun.. with ur best mates.. but then .. inspite of being there u arent there..u just there physically.. but ur mind aint..

u feel so torn between two world..being n not being..u get use to things but some times u just wana let go.. sit back and just get back to ur "home" ..home where u were born .. home where u made ur first steps..home where u slept without any fears..coz it Your Home..Your room.. your bed..where ur parents..are there..
its the same brick and building .. yet theres somthing out there..that makes it all diferent .. so special.. ur home..my home..

fuck..hurt so damn much .. just feeling so sad deep inside.. but hell y .. ??!!! dat is the question i ask myself.. its been 7months.. still 5 more to go..i should be happy .. yet it still feels like d first day i came here.. heart breaking pain .. the second semester will be over as well in just 3 more days.. that should b a good thing.. coz am done.. a last semester ahead.. den it over ..but its so fucking mixed emotions..

went i get back from places.. somtimes i just want it to b my home am heading to .. where ill open d gate.. find my dogs ..barking.. and ill just say .. chup do ..mo mem sa ki zot zaper .. lol..
i want it to be my yard.. where now i wont hide from my little couz..coz i wana b alone... coz now i wana see them....
i want it to my garden..where my dad would sprinkle water on me whenever i pass by..
i want it to my home.. where wen ill get in da kitchen .. mum would saying..
ale baigner avant apres manger .. pa rentre dan la cuisine..
hell i want someone to shout at me .. for having my clothes laying around in my room..
i want someone to say .. Dan bb vien manger ..
i miss u mum .. i miss u dad..i wana hug u both tight right now... i wanna tell u how much i love u both ... how am sorry for all d pains i ever gave u ..
i wanna get back..to the one that give my life a meaning..to reach out and touch him..and stop dreaming ..tm Prav..

hurts so much how much i miss them.. how much it hurts wen sometimes .. u think of them so strongly wen u close ur eyes u see them ther..but wehn u try reach out.. its all gone..coz ur eyes aint close anymore...sometimes i wish ..well ill close them forever..just not to let go of that image of them..

hell it hurts.. it hurts bad.. i feel like shouting this pain out.. but i cant..so i cry my heart out..
tears have dried ..yet the pain remains.. it just like an open wound.. nevr healing.. always sore..from time to time ..u end up hurting urself in that very open wound..and it hurts even more..

yet u still dnt know why..why u sad.. y this pain.. where from .. u just feel ur heart so heavy..u feel ur chest bolt up .. contracting.. as if its gona burst out any sec now.. coz u feeling suffocated with so much pain ..inside..